Where do we go from here?

I must reintroduce myself.  I'm a 40 something female who lives in Georgia.  I work and have worked for the majority of my life.  I have two children and two grandchildren.  Everything I have ever done and will do it for them.  I spent some time in the military.  I've been on public assistance.  I've had A+ credit.  I've worked three jobs.  I've been married.  The only thing I have not done drugs for recreational purposes and that includes weed.  Life has beaten me up, spit me out and I still get up to say, "Come at me, bro."  Why?  Because I don't know anything else to do.  

The past month has been rough on me.  Actually the last five or so years have been rough.  I've watched a culture of idiocy grow into a live version of the movie Idiocracy.  People regurgitate lies as if they are facts and refuse to admit it when you show them the real facts.  A whole bunch of people support a person who lies with impunity and has a vocabulary consisting of 10 to 20 words and that's a benevolent estimate.  I've reached a point where I can no longer play nice.  I swore to myself I would not call them names.  That's no longer on the table

The thing really driving me is the murder of Ahmad Arbrey, Breona Taylor, and George Floyd.  Ahmad shattered me.  I read the retelling of what happened and it took me back to stories I heard of how black men where hunted down during Jim Crow.  Breona destroyed me.  I'm still wondering how cops who they know went into the wrong house, obtained a warrant illegally, and subsequently killed a woman who is still walking the streets.  How is this possible?  Then I watched George Floyd and I died with him.  While most people focus on him gasping for breath and calling out for his mother, my mind returns consistently to the nonchalant demeanor of the cop.  At that moment as I am watching the video,, my mind transposed black and white pictures of the klan standing over dead bodies as if they are trophy kills.  The only thing missing from that cop's face is the cheesy grin of triumph.

I truly don't think a lot of white people get it.  I am only one generation removed from the generation that held lunch counter sit-ins.  I have brothers, sisters, and cousins who grew up at that time.  My mother didn't trust white people and really didn't like them in her home.  Imagine the hell I went through when the one date I had in high school was with a white boy.  He's a story for another time. So I know if these things came to me, I can only imagine how my older family and friends felt.  I'm pretty sure they thought they would never see something like that again.  Yet here we are.

Once my anger and grief subsided, I made some decisions.  I no longer have the patience or time for people who make up ridiculous arguments when these things happen.  These people will definitely receive a sharp reaction.  I'm done trying to teach people.  If I have had the conversation with you more than once and you're still trotting out some of the same defenses, we're done.  If you are in the streets protesting but you cannot be bothered to vote, shut up.  Most importantly, do not question my dedication to this cause.  You might need stitches when I am done.

These decisions are the reason for restarting to blog.  I see the winds of change blowing.  I hear the cries.  What I don't hear or see is leadership.  I don't see a plan to get from here to there.  I don't see someone coming to the front to provide cohesive messaging to give the movement one voice.  All I hear is noise.  So I'm hoping by putting my thoughts into a blog and publishing, someone will read this.  They will share it and maybe I can bring together the strongest voices to devise a plan, to lay out a road map, and to make us ONE voice.

Here's an open invitation to join me to discuss things.  Ask questions converse with one another so that we can really affect the change this moment is giving birth to.